Thursday, August 30, 2007
what is your problem!
what is wrong with people like these that can only see people's negativity and never ever once see good in us. you have to focus all your hatred on me, channel it this way by seeing only the negative side of me but never even give a considerate thought about my other part, i have to admit, sir/mdm, i am not fucking mr perfect.
im sick of being the fella you wanted me to be.
let me guess
"who the fuck call you to act? be your fucking self lar!"
if the above assumption is correct
then to you know that you are a super hypocrite by pin pointing out all my negativity?
u reminds me of my ex.
i know
it is human instinct to critize people and self praise yourself. heck. everyone wanted to reach christhood and none of us wanted to be satan right.
and everyone LOVES to think that they are the holiest of holy and every1 else is evil except them.
who would want to admit their faults nowadays? even churchgoers... hopeless.
so stop fucking giving negative comments to anyone around you, and please, for once, think that every1 is as good as you, and as evil as you.
admit it, bastards/bitches
you are evil too.
"For all have sinned and fall short the glory of God"
hate me.
it will never affect me.
you know why?
you will soon find out
the more you hate people
the more likely you will be hated
"treat others the way you wanted to be treated"
hate me.
i wont mind.
today
i learnt.
no1 can be trusted.
not a single soul.
i give people my trust
i persuaded people to trust me
now
the only thing i can be is
heartless emotionless me.
happy now? no more negative critisim? cannot shoot me down anymore? fail to find fault in me anymore?
buzz off.
im not interested in you, either.
this post is dedicated for all
Hypocrites, betrayers and god-hater.
posted at [12:24 AM]
no1
snap back to reality. if you dislike me, throw me a comment and say you dislike me. i heard enough of the same criticism and yes, thank you for it.
but do you know that there is a time lag there? do u think that im god, saying "May it be so" and puff, it will be so instantly?
for your information:
i value your support as much as your love and as much as your criticism.
everything comes side by side.
so if you can only contribute the talking part
i will contribute mine too:
Fuck off.
posted at [12:17 AM]
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Saturday, August 25, 2007
dedicated to everyone who has the issue of hatred
It's kind of sick,
'cause I've written poems like a kid.
I've got nothing else to say,
it makes me feel so gay.
I make myself to hate some one,
but I think these hatreds inside are gone.
I try to think about more pain,
sorry I ain't got no brain.
Trying to find more rhymes,
just wasted more times.
I don't know where to start,
'cause I've been annonyed by dog barks.
I don't know... I don't know...
Arrrrrrrrr!!!
Let's declare some more hatred war!
Nothing's wrong with me...
nothing's wrong with me,
just that I'm sick of these.
-Anonymous
(Source: http://poets.unknowncommunity.com/db/poems/21587?pl=user )
posted at [12:44 AM]
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Wednesday, August 22, 2007
whats up for... brunch-ner??
just found out that today, i had nothing decent for breakfast, lunch, and dinner!!
the reaons for skipping breakfast:
1. was so awake since 530am.. city tour with bunch of kids till bout 7. bring them back, then i go again!
2. reach uni, didnt finish preparation for presentation yet, so sat down in lab 7 till lunch time. thanks: ash, jac, jane and andrew for being there in the lab. can have a breather compared to the morning atmosphere..
reasons for skipping lunch:
1. class starts at 1pm, and im still nto ready at 1240pm!!
2. class ends at 2pm, straight away ciao to lecture till 4pm!
3. 4pm. finally a decent thing to eat for the day! guess what is it?
New York Chicken large, 1901
Well not like it is very good or nice but the hot dog brings back memories of the last semester in monash old campus, and man, i AM freaking hungry!!!
Reasons for skipping dinner:
1. Knowing that Mr. I-am-cooler-than-you-in-the-eye-of-your-cousins is coming down from penang and stay in klang for awhile. and since the fella is working, ehem. FREE DINNER!! hehehe.. nothing la.. just :
usual suspect 1: Maggi Goreng double packet (+ mata kerbau)
usual suspect 2: Roti Planta (+ kari ayam)
usual suspect 3: Teh tarik * sugar * milk * 2 cups
&
Usual suspect 4: Uncle Muthi (not to be confused with Monash's lecture, Dr Muthi) look alike!
posted at [12:52 AM]
yam cha
i am so freaking glad that i finally got the chance to yam cha with you, albeit the timing is not very good. it is a very very big surprise to all of us seeing you there, just now. although we are not close, but somehow, your appearance made us feel honored; and we take comfort to know that the society still cares.
and anyway, that is the first roti planta you eat in klang eh! hehehehe any differences? chill dude, Restoran TEA is my favourite hang out place with my relatives and friends. mr siva and uncle muthi knows us very well... the roti planta is super "gao gao" 1 and of course, the teh ice u drink consist of extra stuffs too! hehehehe... brother, dont be surprised key... X)
its hillarious seeing how the fck you cut your idiotic roti planta, like trying to kill it or giving it an operation or something. dude, if only i brought a digi cam along with me eh!! sigh... lost the chance to show it to the world dey!
my cousins actually missed you! it seems that your popularity among them has overtaken mine, which is so unfair! you just pop up like once in a blue moon, yet they still treated u as if you are someone they know for 100 years or someone sent from heaven above! ewww.. you are so NOT ok!! X)
next time, we should hang out even more often. heard that you will be staying in klang for awhile.. maybe i can introduce you to some friends of mine here, and maybe i'll show you to my kl friends? hehehe... dont be shy...
btw, prescott hotel is cheap and the service is good. but beware, apparently the hotel is dirty and i heard prostitutes lingers around the area.. hehehehehe... dont pray pray ah!!
nice to meet u again, dude. although u are so not the coolest among us all!!! it IS me!! no denying!
posted at [12:39 AM]
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time management
i should stop it! it is killing me!!! i should really start to be more self-disipline and dont do it anymore! please, i need the strengh to be more self-disipline. omg...
this is some sorta disorder every uni students will feel whenever assignments, reports, lab experiment, surveys, interviews, blablabla, blablabla, and the list goes on. whoa.. wonder how the hell can we all survived man... think of the good ol high school days... i really honestly telling you, i dont remember when is the last time i hand in my maths work. is it during 1B time, or the time Cik Lim forced me to hand up during form 2, or maybe the time i was called to pejabat to finish up my work at form 3.
as you can see, everyone in high school is mourning about how monotomous their life is. cant bring hp lar, cant have bgf lar, cant drive lar, have to wear stupid looking uniforms lar, teachers treat them like kids lar, prefects all stuck up lar (wtf? betraying myself and my board?), list goes on again...
oh life in high school... when is the last time i go speeding with ah kooi + gang at federal, where ttt almost kill everyone in the car and jie wei is racing with puan pavani (eh nonono cik! she always scold us bout it)...
the last time we chirstian union buddies hang out after friday activity at school doing nothing ...
the last time i getta hang out with my "family" in high school, visiting jaya jusco, stay at school for no reasons again, starring at girls...
omfg... the only few survivors are like KC, xuan and you, bear.
where is all the memories dey.
-----
eh out of topic d!!! this post is bout time management. shit. speaking of which i havent start preparing anything for tomorrow presentation, which will start bout 13 horus later... argh! well apparently jill is going to crap and yvonne is kindda sick bout her examples.
i got everything with me now, why not start it?
why?
lets do it!
aja aja fighting!!
btw, time management =
1. Stop napping
2. Stop Diablo II-ing
posted at [12:27 AM]
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dad
dad asked me: "hey arent you bored sitting down at home almost everyday?"
me: "what to do..."
dad: "....."
me: "got car also useless la..."
dad: "why"?
me: "no where to go."
dad: "....."
me: "and"
dad: "and?"
me: "no money."
dad: "hahahahaha"
me: "......"
sigh.. true true. no money, owe jill, kitty kat and ash money. wahlao eh... mana pergi duit saya??
posted at [1:24 AM]
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For those who are still madly in love with their ex-es
WARNING: EMO LYRICS AND POST.
Dedicated for all who still loves their ex deeply. This song is for you.
It is called BK Love by McSniper. BK was still so madly in love with the girl, he cant stand it and as a very close friend, McSniper decided to write and sing a song on behalf of BK. It is in Korean and "Windstruck" used it on the exploding part perfectly.
MTV "BK Love"
Explosion Scene "WindStruck"
-Detective Kim is still thinking of Myeong-Woo when she is on duty. because he is dead.
this is the english translation by an ametuar.
BK Love - MC Sniper
Do you know how I feel?
Those days when I really thought about you
But as my feelings for you grew
Things only got harder for me
I could only shake in the fire
Now, I'm tired and I don't have the confidence to see you
I show my back to you, like a coward
I hate the fact that I want to run away
But I found out too late
When I found out I liked you
Everything changed miserable me
I lost the strength and confidence to talk to you
But I just thought it would good
I was so stupid
I didn't know it would be this hard
I found out too late
All this probably seems like an explanation to you
But my love is only you
I just wish you would know this
There is no person that can love you as much as I do
There's no more pain for me who's watching you leave
I can't let go of the love that's ended I can't cry in sadness baby please
My friend's wet, tired voice is in my mind
The love story that ended in an unexpected way
My friend's hurt and sadness I can't understand
I'm singing for it's too hard to soothe him
For the girl that was like a petal and that you truly loved
The love that you prepared alone for so long
The tears you shed to make that one flower blossom
Couldn't face the light and became a handful of sand released
Spending so many days and nights with a sigh
The hard decision made at the last minute
The hard decision made for her and you Your love's final end
Someday, the unachieved love between you two
Will meet as two lights in the sky
That draw lines in the sky as shooting stars
In the next life, I wish for your love to be achieved
My friend still loves her
But my friend is leaving for that girl
I can't breathe when I think of this as love
Maybe that's why my friend is still crying (BK!)
There's no more pain for me who's watching you leave
I can't let go of the love that's ended I can't cry in sadness baby please
posted at [12:00 AM]
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Thursday, August 16, 2007
the brighter part of the story
instead of having McD with my happening gangs, we ended up having sushi!!! dont ask me why is it but yeah i guess i tested something new. i love sushi. i love ramen n bento-s. i am madly in love with green teas. although jie wei works in genki n jun how works in sushi king, n both genki n king is just around my area, but the last time i rber seeing them n eating sushi is like years ago.
the sushi advent. this time, in a new place (for me), called Sakae Sushi. will post more about it when my buddy, the best blogger in msia, post bout it. will use the copy and paste system, no need to reference or cite or give credit. simple as that!
jac, correct?
[breaking news]
jacjac ™ says:
:'(
jacjac ™ says:
lazy bugger..
jacjac ™ says:
LOL
jacjac ™ says:
better cite that u take from me
jacjac ™ says:
my hard work of laoding pics ,k! [ian: what is laoding anyway? some cina orang?]
jacjac ™ says:
(Jacyln, 2007)
posted at [11:57 PM]
its raining
Aerith's limit 4: Great Gospel.
12am, and it rains. the classic. brings back all the memories i had since im small. with ex-es, ex-friends, ex this ex that...
today have been a disastrous day. shit happens since morning all the way till night. i think it is raining season again. it rains when i wanted to drive u yesterday, and it rains again tonight. u must have been very tired of your work. sleep tight.
as for me, im still in deep shock of whatever happened today. first, the Smart Tag incident, second, the 8 miss calls incidents, after that the unser-go-wrong-way-outside-carrefour incident, after that chen wa's incident, concludes with the fatal sms i sent. went out yam cha and almost soaked under rain. have some quiet thinking today as my ever supportive friends stood by me and shoot me down with reality again. i like it.
this rain.
this memories. what is this.
the coolness of the night.
the memories.
let me sleep.
tomorrow will be a new day, right?
but, there will not be a day as eventful as today for this month. not anymore.
oh god.
EMO! XP i dono can consider this as emo not! hehehehe but it is just what im thinking now lar. nothing personal! X)
posted at [11:42 PM]
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Wednesday, August 15, 2007
hanging out....
I finally gotta hang out with someone. i finally got to let go of the past and really stand up for the future. although the time is short, but significant, and i cherish it.
my utmost congrats for both l-l and r-y, you girls did it, before i can. but anyway, today might enter into history as 1 of the most significant day of 2007. may it be so.
and, lets pray, there's is a second time.
posted at [10:30 PM]
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its over!!
that's it. im done with my stupid IM assignment! although i know i dont put in too much effort like most of my IM mates, yet i feel that i learn alot in my assignments + i still get to socialize and have a life ok! i miss hanging out at mamak on friday nights and pooling on asia club, but im all tied down by this assignment. and yes, now that this is over, i shall feel more relax and stop rejecting invitation already!
i still remember how tension i am when jill came at 10am telling me she is handing up hers soon and jac handed up both hers and ing's assignments. jane pressured me again by saying, "wah u not bad ah.. still tis part only. i finis liao. damn happy" and give me this X) look. heh, i feel like wacking u k! :@
lab 6's printer rosak, printing out lines of smiley face and jac says that aliens are communicating with us. the 3 girls is chatting behind while im punishing my sins for delaying my assignment by ignoring everything they say and keep copy-paste everything from journals! jac even try to "irritate" me by showing all her nice photos and telling me to read her blog as there is new updates finally. (i havent read it till now).
xuan keeps me entertained by her college jokes but still i can only reply her with few words. she seems pissed, and till now still refuses to pick up my phone. XP cham-ness..
another sms came in telling me to go Asia Club instantly, bout 3pm (1 hour before due time). apparently someone is holding a farewell party there by playing pool and most of them are there, of course except me. i asked for a delay, which they flatly rejected and screwed me again for not going.
while im still rushing to do my bloody referencing (trust me it is a crazy job), ingrid called and ask me why am i still not down there yet. i thought, "hey whats the rush? your staying rite", but i was wrong, dead wrong. the clock shows 3:30pm and i am still there correcting my referencing. goddamn! why am i using so many journals in the first place! *geram*
but still, i finally made it at about 3:40, with another invitation sms received. i have to rush to library to print out my work, as i say printer in lab 6 is invaded by aliens signal. due to panic-ness, i give myself a tour of monash unvisited area, Block 5. while, technically i was really right outside the library door on the 3rd floor, guess what? they lock it. cool. hp clock shows 3:42. while rushing, i bang into a lecturer whom used to dislike me last year, and yeah. apology is hard to be accepted right? so spent another 2 minutes there.
library, 3:49. finally i started to print my assignment out. guess what? printer 3 cacat-ed. every1 lining up to see their cacat-ed works. rush back, print on printer 1, and it works out well. jason was scorning me from behind as i really look kindda pathetic. clock says it is 3:53 when i finished printed out everything. To the business school.
3:56. "where the fc is tee's assignment box?? ah! found it.. wait a minute, why is flier doing inside the "assignment box??".. wait a minute, this is the lecturers post box (or call it whatever you want)!!!
3:58. Rush up to the second floor of the school of business. found assignment box. ready to submit when i saw bunch of people surrounding the assignment box. bunch of pathetic fools, arent we.
3:59. submitted. the end of Assignment 1.
4:03. saw andrew and hong and join them for "fun and laughter" to keep me sane after all the crazy things that happen...
6:00. home sweet home..
-----------------------------------
ian would like to give thanks to the following for their total love and support of Assignment 1.
Dad, Mom, sis, Jac, Jill, Jane, Ashley, Lilian, Ingrid, cousin A, cousin B, Andrew, Aaron, and Karen. Not to forget our evergreen tutor, Miss Lee.
ian would like to say sorry to the following people for ignoring them during my assignment period.
DM, Kee Cheong, Xuan, Bear, Imran.
ian would like to say really sorry for the following:
1. Kee Cheong (invited me to AC for 4 times already, yet..)
2. Bear (you havent even come to my house yet)
3. DM (i dont meant to ignore you and him, but yeah)
4. God (sigh...)
5. Myself (you deserve some rest now)
Thats it for assignment 1. Squall, Quistis, Irvine, Zell, Rinoa and others are waiting for me outside Galbadia... cya, reality.
posted at [7:59 PM]
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i found someone
i found someone that i finally can say things out from my brain without really polish it. the friend of mine is like the gem of gems in my social circle. the fact that we are not in the same world, and not interested to step into any relationship world, says it all. all my friends are nice and good people, but sometimes you feel pressure and hard because you have to filter whatever you have to say before you really say it out.
so, questions:
how will you feel, when you can freely saying anything to the friend, knowing that the friend actually listen to you, every single detail?
how about, you love to listen to the friend too?
you feel for the friend, you feel that the friend needs you, and you feel important at least for once.
i dont know how long we can chat like this, but i really sincerely thank you.
*name of the mysterious friend is intended to keep as secret*
posted at [12:14 AM]
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Wednesday, August 8, 2007
Diet report
Diet report:
Sample: Ian Valentine
DOB: 87
Weight: Undisclosed
Success rate: 0%
target weight drop: 10-20kg
reasons:
1. Too fat
2. Too fat, got belly
3. Looks ugly with belly
Methods on dieting:
1. Don't ask for any allowance
2. Monash's RM1 nasi lemak
3. No more Friday mamak
4. Convience myself that Ah Ma's cooking is way better than McD
5. Have Gardenia everyday.
Advantages of dieting:
1. More money to spend on other stuffs (thinking of Digi Cam, iPod FM transmitter, new Jeans)
2. Increase Bank Account's figure
3. Charity.
4. Health reason
Disadvantages of dieting: Undisclosed
-Report End-
posted at [6:52 PM]
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From this moment
From this moment, I believe that I must move on with life. I don't need no substitutes in my life again. I have recently found out that I owe alot of debts to all my friends - as in real friends - all these while. They stand by me during my 3 years of failed and fruitless relationship, they talked to me, and they wanted to meet up with me; they shown great concern to me... how badly I repay them. Trust me, you got no idea.
And after 3 years time, here they are, supporting me n my blog. I never know that I actually receive friends' love so much (*100) more than from her. My best memory goes to the night, and morning of 31/12/2006 and 1/1/2007. No wonder they say that friends is the gift from God only second to parents.
I do not understand how some people I know actually led astrayed by their friends, betrayed, misused, or even lead them to a road that they can never turn back. I really don't understand how you can still continue living your life with them with "Great Expectations" and actually entrust your future onto people like them.
No offense to any people out there that fits the bill, but I'd mixed with these people in my life at high school before. I just don't get it. They really don't have good friends? Not holy friends, but at least someone that is trustable?? I pity them. But that's how life goes. You are your best teacher. The only one that can really teach yourself is you. God bless you, peeps. X)
Oh my god. Lord, what have i done to deserve friends like them? Both the evil and the angelic. God, if that is the way you want to teach me bout life, I praise you. Yes Lord. These good friends are all gifts from you. Pray that i'll cherish them, 1 by 1.
Well. Let's see. What else can I crap today? hmmmmm....
Yeah, i hope i can get a digi cam as a birthday present, so that this page will not be as empty already! X) yippee!! my own digi cam!
posted at [11:04 PM]
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10 reasons why I'm happy being single.
10. No longer need to talk on telephone for 100 hours a month.
9. No longer need to report whereabouts, and the WWWH in details again.
8. No need to crack, bang, scream or suft net just to find the best birthday gift anymore.
7. No longer need to suffer anymore unreasonable craps.
6. No need to argue anymore. Hallelujah.
5. No more pressure, can concentrate on studies, friends and family.
4. No need to drive around town just to find a suitable place to eat.
3. No need to pay for fancy foods anymore.
2. Feel relax, can flirt around with more people.
1. BANK ACCOUNT CAN FINALLY INCREASE!!!!!!
posted at [5:25 PM]
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internati...... zzzzz
Currently (repeatingly) listening to: Those who Fight (FF7), Composer: Nubuo Eumatsu
Mood: Feel like fighting off all the assignment and go K!
Starring blindly at the IM text book... I love the photoes of Taj Mahal in Agra, the euro sign, the Big Ben of London, the Sydney Opera House in Sydney, Chinatown (entahlah. any Chinatown in the world EXCEPT Petaling Street), and the famed Disneyland-looked cathedral St. Basil's Cathedral in Moscow... man I wish I can visit all these places once in my life. The only place mentioned above that I actually visited is the sydney harbor, when I'm 12. Even by then, I wasted the golden opportunity of having a glance of the Opera House. Instead, Jarred and his brother tempted us to have a game of, all of things, chua dai D. wtf.
others, sigh. at least ah wan represented us when he visits the big ben during his study in london.
But what piss me off is the few bold words written in the middle of it, check it out:
even blogger wanted to censor the line. Magnifiy by 100X, and you will see this line:
International Management
Managing Across Borders and Cultures
Fitfh Edition
Helen Deresky
SIEN AR!!!! x(
posted at [9:55 PM]
cost cutting
My family is a happy family :) , or so I thought :(. Lately I really forgot when I last saw any1 of them actually smile and crack trademarked Lee family style witty jokes and humor. Even the clown seems to frown (fingers pointing at Ah Wan).
Being a Monashian is indeed something to be proud of, if you ignore how the Uni and the envioronment burns your wallet. Petrol and highway tolls, yeah although it is not completely paid by me, but imagine my parents burning money for me so that I can step into Monash safely, have lunch safely, hangout with friend happily and go home safely. Crazy.
Well, as a "good" son, the only thing I can help now, other then giving helping hand in their work during holiday, is to help them cut cost.
X) Having budget deficit ma...
So, let’s see how to save cost...
1. Stop McD. Diet, healthy and a superb cost cutting method. Imagine, RM13.75 everyday.
2. Monash's RM1 nasi lemak isn’t that bad, and since every weekday morning my friends Jac or Ash will be there starring at me eating, so yeah, it taste better.
3. Use federal highway. Be smart. Don't be a retard.
4. Hangout with Wei Ling and get super budget. Who else can get 2 pair of guy's shoe for RM49? I'll be willing to drive you for a day.
5. Ask Ah Ma for money to have my hair cut.
6. My trademark. Ask for RM10, spend RM1, and the rest of the money shall be in my disposal. How else can I have enough cash to even go bowling or karaoke, left alone Asia Club (Imran, that is why I always can't go there with you), Dragon-i (jac, jill, ash, i still miss that place, and also Eric. sigh), Mufi (wanted to buy something there for xuan for like the past 1 year already), Uncle Seng, Auntie Kwan (which I promised some of you for years!), gym (sigh!!), and others ???
7. Stop buying ramly burgers or maggi goreng or teh ice. Refer to no.1.
8. Drink Xut Cha in University rather than chocalate Coke.
9. Stop buying Uni's RM1.80 soya bean. No joke, RM1.80.
10. Be sure I follow all the rules stated above.
There. My first crusade war against $!! To war!!
Materialism. That is the price to pay. KeeCheong and my ex shoot me down by asking me, "isn't that the way you wanted to live your life?" Xuan said: "simple is beauty". Sigh...
posted at [11:57 AM]
second advent!!
wuhooooo.... I’m back I’m back!!! The one with many names and many previous blogs! lol... bloggy give one the impression of a trendy thing now.. Hard to update but it is just very tempting to create your own website, isn’t it?
JIA YOU!!
Have to semangat update it!! And have to get more comments from my beloved readers!
Alright, let’s go straight to the point. Gloria privatus literally means "deprived of my glory". It is taken from the medieval poetry Carl Orff based his Carmina Burana on the song "FORTUNAE PLANGO VULNERA". Viva la LATIN! X) (Don’t feel like going too much in detail. lackluster stuffs)
I felt that my glory deprived since long time ago. My high school's glory has been literally torn down and I’m a perfect symbol of a fallen angel, in the eye of my juniors. The most talkative senior, and the most "lanci" 1, sacked for mysterious reasons. XP but then again, I didn’t regretted at all!!
So it begins. Firsthand, real story, by the author himself. My real story. Stay tune. Over and out!
In Fortunae solio sederam elatus, prosperitatis vario flore coronatus;
quicquid enim florui felix et beatus nunc a summo corrui gloria privatus.
(On the throne of Fortune I had sat elated, crowned with the gay
flower of prosperity; however much I flourished, happy and blessed, now I have
fallen from the pinnacle, deprived of my glory. )
posted at [1:37 AM]
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